It’s 5:30 a.m. and I have stumbled into the kitchen supposing I’m alone. I pour the coffee and begin to stir my cream and sugar. Suddenly I hear an angry growl coming from our attached living room, “Don’t wake the kids!”
Of course the voice came from Jade, my wife, who had been up since 5 a.m. She had been all alone. I stopped for a minute and thought about that. It’s 5:30 a.m. they won’t be awake for another hour and half. Then it hit me like a ton of bricks.
This is the most precious time of her day. It’s her quiet time. The only time of the day she can sit alone in pure silence. This is her time. Her time to pray, read a daily devotional, the Scriptures, drink her coffee (that she made quietly), or even just meditate on the day ahead. It is her alone time!
Usually, I am not an early riser and grasp every bit of sleep I can get before I get up, get ready, then head off to work. My only worry is what lies ahead in the workplace. I can sneak off into my office for a few minutes here and there for some alone time. Take a lunch break and sleep in my office with the door locked that is telling my staff “Shawn’s alone time, Do not disturb!”. My wife cannot do that.
Why?
Because not only is she the everyday caretaker of our 4 precious children, she is also their teacher. It is no secret that we home school our children and are thankful that the Lord has made it possible for us to do so. If you are reading this blog it is likely that you are a home school parent as well. If you are a mother reading this I am certain you are saying, “Yes, Yes! Don’t wake the kids! I need alone time!”
If you are a home school dad that happens to be reading this (because your wife has made you do so) then hopefully you can also oblige. It’s the little things. Just be mindful of your wife and her needs and the necessity for alone time. I wrote something similar in a post when preparing for the Sunday morning chaos prior to church.
It’s the little things that our wives need and desire. Thinking about going the extra mile to put in or fold a load of laundry, or two. Putting the dishes away and loading a new batch into the dishwasher. By the way, after 13 years of marriage there is nothing that makes you sexier to your wife than bathing kids, doing laundry or dishes.
So think twice before hitting that ice dispenser at night when the kids are asleep. Think thrice before stirring the condiments into the coffee like a madman at 5:30 a.m. Don’t wake the kids!
A Time to Sleep
Every time I read Ecclesiastes I am baffled why it is that the Holy Spirit did not have Solomon write the following:
“There is a time to sleep and a time to wake”
Sleep is a great thing. We all need it. In fact, we can become monsters reverting back to our old, prior to our Christian conversion, behavior if we are lacking sleep. The kids especially need sleep when they are 6 months old and Mom really would like to hear the Sunday morning message.
This is a time often missed by nursing mothers. It’s just a hard thing to try and juggle when the blessed nursery workers just can’t be a substitute for mom. Even for a short time. It’s like alone time, just different!
A Time To Be Alone
So father’s just remember the next time you arise early and fumble into the bathroom making noises that may have risen Lazarus (okay not really but you get the point), think about your wife. Think about her already awake and alone. Think of her in the living room with her cup of coffee that she was able to make without a peep. And the fact that she is alone! She is enjoying it, immensely enjoying it. Remember, “Don’t wake the kids!” before you rattle that cup.
Your wife will appreciate it…and so will your kids!
By: Shawn Waugh
**Shawn (AKA Dr. Luke) is the host of the “Word For America” program heard weekly on www.graceliferadio.com
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